The Sell Out

What did you want to be when you grew up?

For some the idea of being a wife and mother was all they could ever want. A family, someone to take care of them, someone to take care of. To belong to something greater than themselves. To do something worthwile. To feel the love of a child, one of the greatest feelings of all.

For some they wanted to change the world. They wanted to make it better/different/louder/softer/bigger/smaller and/or more religious. They saw a need for change and betterman-ship.

Some wanted to rule the world. They wanted the whole world to see how great they are and have become. They wanted to opress, regress, and make their mark. They feed for more attention, therefore they tighten their rule.

Some had some dreams. Now they can't remember what they were. But they weren't this. They weren't sadness, they weren't splitting hairs about right and wrong, they weren't being told what, how and when they do things incorrectly. They weren't being cut down. They distinctly can remember they were being lifted up, being praised, being respected. They might not have a face anymore but those dreams didn't include tears. Or waiting...and waiting. What they wanted to be is far far gone, and who they are isn't the face they recognize in the mirror. Each day they sink deeper and deeper into a black hole. They can't even dream anymore, they dont' know what they want for the future, they can't see that far. They can only feel the now and wipe the tears. Maybe they held on too long, maybe they held out for more. Maybe one by one the numbers were drawn and they were left holding the loosing ticket.

Maybe they sold out?